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Marrian Wrote:
still i wanna play dumb, lemme ask this question. thinking of those hundred of married peeps having undefined realtionship, those guys and gurls cheating with their partners(bfs/gfs) back home and the broken relationship and promises.... how difficult is it to resist temptation here?
Not just here, but anywhere in the world for that matter. here is no different to London, Hong Kong, NY or wherever. If you are moving to a country for a long period and you have a relationship (bf/gf) then it best to break it off if they are not coming with you or planning on joining you later.
No matter what happens, YOU change, the other person does not. You are seeing different things, meeting different people from different cultures, which you bf/gf back home are NOT. YOU change.
OK, here's a leading question: You meet someone who is nice, easy going, sensitive and overall nice, and can offer you a life better than you would with your current b/f. What do YOU do?
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not unless i lose the spark and magic with my bf, and fall inlove with this 'someone' even if i resisted, then I think it's time to break off with him.
Any sensible comments from the ladies' side?...
you ougtha know me...
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"love is fickle, love is blind ......................."
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lolzz :lol: :wink:
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well, anybody would do the same. We all need some one close to us, not far away!
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 cratch: cratch: :roll: hmmmmm.... yeah....
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Ziajaveds has said it all. He lost his 10yrs relationship of being 2 yrs apart, I lost my 6++yrs relationship of being 6 mos. apart. Tried to work it out, but couldn't. World just became different.
A bond or committment should not make you suffer of loneliness because you are taken. You need the person to be there, to talk to, to cry on, to hold you and tell you that everything is gonna be alright. It makes a lot of difference.
It never really works especially if you already established a career somewhere else.
And the hardest part of it is, starting anew, getting to know, starting from scratch, adjustment stage. Not again! Its like you have a set of expectations outlined for the next guy and if he can't comply, you're gonna end up heartbroken.
One thing I've learned in all these years is not to make love when you really don't feel it; there's probably nothing worse you can do to yourself than that. by: Norman Mailer
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Quote:And the hardest part of it is, starting anew, getting to know, starting from scratch, adjustment stage. Not again! Its like you have a set of expectations outlined for the next guy and if he can't comply, you're gonna end up heartbroken.
would that mean, on your experience there's no third party involved? how come you gave up just cuz of the distance, where you know from the start that working abroad will mean thousand of miles away? So how about the love for 6++ years?!
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An important reason I visit this forum is to read your one liners!! :-).
The only way to get rid of temptation is to yeild to it....
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Quote:An important reason I visit this forum is to read your one liners!! .
Victory's avid fan?! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Yes, just simply because of that.
One thing I've learned in all these years is not to make love when you really don't feel it; there's probably nothing worse you can do to yourself than that. by: Norman Mailer
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Long distance relationships are next to impossible to sustain. but I think if you start from a solid base of friendship when you meet again you could pick up where you left off. Love doesn't die just because someone isn't physically able to be with you.
But you have to be realistic -- life can't stand still. You have to be able to live your life in the present. You can't be living for the next meeting or the time you are finally together. its too intense and I think you stand still as a person.
I was in a long distance relationship which I ended before I came to brisbane. My boyfriend ( I shoudl say ex...) left SA to travel last July and we continued our relationship. i saw him once in October and it was great . But ultimately I couldn't handle the uncertainty of it and the wondering when we'd be together again so I gave myself and him some certainty....
anyway we talk as much as we did when we were officially together. he's still my greatest support even if he's not with me.
long distance is not for the faint hearted. even if in this age of seemingly easy communication....
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Marrian Wrote:Quote:And the hardest part of it is, starting anew, getting to know, starting from scratch, adjustment stage. Not again! Its like you have a set of expectations outlined for the next guy and if he can't comply, you're gonna end up heartbroken.
would that mean, on your experience there's no third party involved? how come you gave up just cuz of the distance, where you know from the start that working abroad will mean thousand of miles away? So how about the love for 6++ years?!
hi my old friend ... LETS GET REAL !!!!!!! LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP GOT ONLy 10 % chance of success so ... a real peice of advice ..
Leave as FRIENDs ... in that case he/she would be yours forever ....
rather than leave as lovers and fight a loosing battle ... where at the end you know bad words would be given, with shatterd trust and posibly violent reactions.
while with friends ... if all works out well and you come back ... he's or you are still single then you can continue what you've started...
so the Q is ... what he found someone while ur gone....??? accept it and be happy for him. it only means that your not meant for each other.. and i advice you to do the same. and be happy to know that even though he has someone you know that you didnt loose him ... because he's your friend...
now isnt that a prettier picture ....
than going through agonizing 3-4 years of restrictions, jealousy miss trust ... i mean LETS BE real all long distance relationship suffer from this dillema, and 90 perscent of them end up in flames !!!, some call them names they wont even call their enemies, some killed themselves, some killed, etc. etc. ...
another Q' why are they reacting like that ??? because trust was broken.. and they all felt cheated, betrayed... by someone who they love ... trust ...
and pride comes to play to....
so ... if you really treasure and love the guy ... make friends with him ... and see when you come back .... its a win win situation ....
good = you get back together ...
bad = you lost him but you have a friend ...
GOOD LUCK !!
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[quote="Kalay"]Long distance relationships are next to impossible to sustain. but I think if you start from a solid base of friendship when you meet again you could pick up where you left off.
so true !!!!!!!!!
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Yeah right! distance love affair is never easy...
The loneliness we feel when we are far apart with our partners , in most cases, can easily defeat the love. This happens especially when we miss
them(the one we want to share ur life with)and when they are not able to be by our side.
However, I still believed that each mile that seperates 2 person who truly care, can be joined with strong love they have got and the foundation of their relationship.
Having faith with each other,and believing that they do feel the same say,
standing firm with the trust, though most of the time it's tough,for the sake of long lasting relations, this is a must.
Thinking of one another's emotional needs, letting them know that we always care. Not letting the seeds of jealousy grow deep in our heart. Cuz if we let this happened,our relationship will surely be doomed to fall apart.
Being honest to how we feel, and never lead the other one on. It is unfair and irresponsible to play around with other's feelings, and turn around one day and walk away.
Not to give up for the love, and hold on to what we feel from deep
within.
Cuz for me, love that is sincere and strong, will be held together, no matter how apart......... :wink:
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It was very touching to read that above, but seriously, wake up and smell the coffee. it DOES NOT work, get out of the fantasy world.
Again, this will all blown away if you meet somebody else you think is really nice!
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