06-28-2004, 12:21 AM
A French football fan, a German football fan and an English football fan
are
all in Saudi localia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze, when all of a
sudden, Saudi police rush in and arrest them.
The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi localia, so for
the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they are
all sentenced to death.
However, after many months and with the help of good lawyers, they are able
to successfully appeal their sentences down to life imprisonment.
By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial
finished, and the extremely benevolent Mister decided they could be
released
after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip.
As they were preparing for the whipping, the Mister announced "It is my
first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow you one wish
before your whipping."
The Frenchman was first in line, he thought for a while and then said,
"Please tie a pillow to my back". This was done, but the pillow only lasted
10 lashes before the whip went through. When the punishment was done, he
had
to be carried away bleeding and crying in pain.
The German was next up. After watching the Frenchman's pain in horror, he
said smugly "Please fix two pillows to my back". But even two pillows could
only take 15 lashes before the whip went through and again the German was
led away whimpering loudly (as they do)
The Englishman was the last one up, but before he could say anything the
Mister turned to him and said. " You are from a most beautiful part of the
world and your culture is one of the finest in the world. For this you may
have two wishes".
"Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful Highness" The Englishman replied.
"My first wish is that you give me not 20 lashes, but 100 lashes". "Not
only are you an honourable person, you are also very brave" said the Mister
with an admiring look on his face. If a 100 lashes is what you desire, then
so be it. And your second wish?.
"Tie the Frenchman to my back".
are
all in Saudi localia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze, when all of a
sudden, Saudi police rush in and arrest them.
The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi localia, so for
the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they are
all sentenced to death.
However, after many months and with the help of good lawyers, they are able
to successfully appeal their sentences down to life imprisonment.
By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial
finished, and the extremely benevolent Mister decided they could be
released
after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip.
As they were preparing for the whipping, the Mister announced "It is my
first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow you one wish
before your whipping."
The Frenchman was first in line, he thought for a while and then said,
"Please tie a pillow to my back". This was done, but the pillow only lasted
10 lashes before the whip went through. When the punishment was done, he
had
to be carried away bleeding and crying in pain.
The German was next up. After watching the Frenchman's pain in horror, he
said smugly "Please fix two pillows to my back". But even two pillows could
only take 15 lashes before the whip went through and again the German was
led away whimpering loudly (as they do)
The Englishman was the last one up, but before he could say anything the
Mister turned to him and said. " You are from a most beautiful part of the
world and your culture is one of the finest in the world. For this you may
have two wishes".
"Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful Highness" The Englishman replied.
"My first wish is that you give me not 20 lashes, but 100 lashes". "Not
only are you an honourable person, you are also very brave" said the Mister
with an admiring look on his face. If a 100 lashes is what you desire, then
so be it. And your second wish?.
"Tie the Frenchman to my back".
life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so lets get wasted all of the time and have the time of our life.
