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A pakistani opens the sugar jar.... looks inside... shuts it...goes away... comes back... opens the jar....looks inside... shuts it...goes away... comes back... looks inside... shuts it...goes away... comes back...
Why?
The doctor asked him to check the sugar level regularly
Husband: Let's go out and have some fun tonight.
Wife: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.
Two Ironiahmen had just won $5000,000 in a lottery. Having a pint in a pub Tim say to Sean, what about all them beggin letters, Sean replies, we'll just keep sending them.
The only way to get rid of temptation is to yeild to it....
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Dear Receiver,
You have just received a Sardarji virus. Since we are not so
technologically advanced, this is a MANUAL virus. Please delete all the
files on your hard disk yourself and send this email to everyone you know.
Thank you very much for helping me.
AUDAKKAN SINGH HACKER
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NASA was getting ready to launch a very important space shuttle. The scientists and engineers checked and double checked everything to make sure that things are fine. However, on the day of our launch, something seemed to be wrong. The rocket gave all sorts of noise but never took off even an inch from the ground. The engineers were puzzled because they could not figure out the problem. Finally, there was a Pakistani scientist who offered to help. NASA people were desperate by that time and agreed to do anything. "Tilt the rocket 45 degrees to the right" said the Pakistani scientist. The engineers were puzzled but did it anyway. "Bring it back to vertical position" the Pakistani said. The engineers did. "Now start the engines" he said. And surprise, the rocket took off and flew into outer space! Everybody congratulated him and asked him how he knew what to do.
He replied - "It is very simple. This is what we always do with our Vespa scooters in Pakistan".
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A true story from the Japanese Embassy in US: Prime Minister Mori was given some basic English conversation training before he visits Washington and meets with President Bill Clinton. The instructor told Mori " Prime Minister, when you shake hand with President Clinton, please say 'how are you'. Then Mr. Clinton should say> "I am fine, and you?" Now you should say 'me too'.
Afterwards we, translators, will do all the work for you." It looks quite simple, but the truth is .... When Mori met Clinton, he mistakenly said "Who Are You?". Mr. Clinton was a bit shocked but still managed to react with humor "Well, I am Hilary's husband, ha ha..."
Then Mori replied confidently "Me too, ha ha ha.."
Then there was a long silent moment in the meeting room.
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A very beautiful woman was walking on the roof of a building and she suddenly trips over something and falls down. On her way falling down, an American man catches her, she says : "Oh thank you, you saved my life, I'll do ANYTHING for you..." The man says : "Okay then, sleep with me." She says : "You PIG!! NEVER !! " So he says : " FINE! " and he drops her down....
So she's falling and screaming...
Suddenly a German man catches her in the air from his balcony, she says : " Oh thank you, you saved me, I'll do anything that you ask..." The guy says : "Fraulein, sleep with me." She replies : " Oh you nasty pig !!! NEVER! " So the man says : " Fine !!! " and he also drops her down again.
She's falling and thinking that it was better if she slept with one o f those men and now she's going to die. Suddenly, a Muslim man catches the woman from his balcony, she says : "Oh thank you, you saved my life, I'll SLEEP with you!! "
The Muslim man replies : " Astaqfirulla'h! " and he drops her.
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A woman crawling across the floor on her hands and knees, half naked, and spunk dripping out of both sides of her mouth.
What does this tell you??
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THe floor is LEVEL
:lol: :lol:
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Ooooooooooooooo, a bit below the belt that one me old mukka! hahahahahahahahaha
> This guy was lonely, so he decided life would be more fun if he had a
> pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to
> buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a
> centipede which came in a little white box to use for his house.
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> He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and
> decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the bar to have a
> drink.
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> So he asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to Frank's
> with me and have a beer?"
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> But there was no answer from his new pet. This bothered him a bit,
but
> he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "How about going to
> the bar and having a drink with me?"
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> But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he
waited
> a few minutes more, thinking about the situation.
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> He decided to ask him one more time; this time putting his face up
> against the centipede's house and shouting, "Hey, in there! Would you
> like to go to Frank's place and have a drink with me?"
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> Scroll down!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE GOING TO LOVE THIS!
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> "I heard you the first time! I'm putting my fu**1ng shoes on."
>
294bhp of sheer V6 Jap pleasure.
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ONE NIGHT 4 MBA STUDENTS WERE BOOZING TILL LATE NIGHT AND DIDN'T STUDY FOR THE TEST WHICH WAS SCHEDULED FOR THE NEXT DAY.
IN THE MORNING THEY THOUGHT OF A PLAN. THEY MADE THEMSELVES LOOK AS DIRTY AND WEIRD AS THEY COULD WITH GREASE AND DIRT. THEY THEN WENT UP TO THE DEAN AND SAID THAT THEY HAD GONE OUT TO A WEDDING LAST NIGHT AND ON THEIR RETURN THE TYRE OF THEIR CAR BURST AND THEY HAD TO PUSH THE CAR ALL THE WAY BACK AND THAT THEY WERE IN NO CONDITION TO APPEAR FOR THE TEST THEN DEAN WAS A JUST PERSON SO HE SAID THAT YOU CAN HAVE THE RETEST AFTER 3 DAYS. THEY SAID THEY WILL BE READY BY THAT TIME.
ON THE THIRD DAY THEY APPEARED BEFORE THE DEAN. THE DEAN SAID THAT THIS WAS A SPECIAL CONDITION TEST.ALL FOUR WERE REQUIRED TO SEPARATE CLASSROOMS FOR THE TEST. THEY ALL AGREED AS THEY HAD PREPARED WELL IN THE LAST THREE DAYS. THE TEST CONSISTED OF 2 QUESTIONS WITH TOTAL OF 100 MARKS
Q .1. WRITE DOWN YOUR NAMES -----( 2 MARKS )
Q.2. WHICH SIDE OF THE TYRE BURST ??? ----( 98 MARKS )
I believe in Karma what you give is what you get in return.
